New plan for Dove
Jul. 20th, 2009 12:58 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cl0ckw0rkf0xLast night Joshua Palmatier did a critique of The Eyelet Dove. He's got a trilogy out, so this is a successful, established, published author. I was really excited.
He read the questions i posted in the authors notes and addressed them - it was awesome. He gave me a lot of insight on the lack of emotional involvement in the story, so that I think I have a better idea what to do to fix it, which will mainly mean overcoming my paranoia of being over dramatic.
As to what I could cut to make the story shorter, he said the same thing as several others have, mainly the ones I felt got the story and were paying attention to it. He said he didn't think cutting anything could improve the story, and to expand it into a novel.
So back to the grinding stone. Probably have to make notes first on what needs to be added. The Simone thing is going to be expanded big time, I got a kickass idea of how to play with Maddie's feelings towards the woman dating her crush. I also need to mention the Dove earlier in the story. And the Key coder/watch thing, I was going to introduce the daughter of the inventor as it's delivered, and have Maddie make friends with her. Maybe explain more of the resistance's plans.
I'm rereading the Westmark trilogy for the third time (I loved that one as a teenager; I always fall in love with the main character). It's set kind of in that time period, and it's the start of my fascination for civil unrest and rebellion within a country rather than between two countries. It was really the birth of the Avaline resistance. And my favourite character in Llyod Alexanders books is always the one who dies tragically. (RIP, Adaon and Justin :()
He read the questions i posted in the authors notes and addressed them - it was awesome. He gave me a lot of insight on the lack of emotional involvement in the story, so that I think I have a better idea what to do to fix it, which will mainly mean overcoming my paranoia of being over dramatic.
As to what I could cut to make the story shorter, he said the same thing as several others have, mainly the ones I felt got the story and were paying attention to it. He said he didn't think cutting anything could improve the story, and to expand it into a novel.
So back to the grinding stone. Probably have to make notes first on what needs to be added. The Simone thing is going to be expanded big time, I got a kickass idea of how to play with Maddie's feelings towards the woman dating her crush. I also need to mention the Dove earlier in the story. And the Key coder/watch thing, I was going to introduce the daughter of the inventor as it's delivered, and have Maddie make friends with her. Maybe explain more of the resistance's plans.
I'm rereading the Westmark trilogy for the third time (I loved that one as a teenager; I always fall in love with the main character). It's set kind of in that time period, and it's the start of my fascination for civil unrest and rebellion within a country rather than between two countries. It was really the birth of the Avaline resistance. And my favourite character in Llyod Alexanders books is always the one who dies tragically. (RIP, Adaon and Justin :()